I am tired of people making judgments on half truths or hear-says, so I am going to lay down what happened in Writing.  If anyone forms any opinion then better or for worse, it should come out of first hand accounts, and not some gossip dripped down from the grapevine.  Originally I didn't want to bring this out in the open because I wanted to protect people, seeing as what happened there is no point to it now.  Maybe it is better to get it out in the open, only time will tell.

But the following accounts are from my memory, dates might not be exact but they shouldn't be off by more than few days.  Relative time frame should be good.

If anyone have any corrections (including grammar or spelling) or questions you can e-mail it to JamesX_News@Earthlink.net, or you can send me a message via POL.  I will append any corrections at the bottom of this page.

e-mail to Girlfriend
e-mail to Ulu

E-mail from Rhianna
Reply E-mail to Rhianna
2nd Reply to the same Email from Rhianna, I forgot to address a part of it
3rd e-mail to Rhianna, to correct an mistake I made on my reply before

2nd E-mail from Rhianna
Reply to her 2nd E-mail

3rd E-mail from Rhianna

Ulu's Correction E-mail
Clearfications I made after Ulu's Correction

This is not the final version, so far its only my version.  Until the other people directly involved in this drama add in their difference in views this document really isn't complete.

It really started with Me, Ulu and Ardahl, but let me elaborate what happened before that though.
　

The Prologue

I started seeing someone in RL. That someone happen to play FFXI as well.

She is so happy we are seeing each other she wanted to tell someone. She asked if it is ok to tell Ardahl. And I said it is perfectly fine. She told Ardahl, and on her own accord made Ardahl promise to not tell anyone, to which Ardahl promised.

Now the center of the Drama.

Act I

Ulu and I role-play in game. She specifically said she treats real life and game as two separate things. So I didn't think too much about role-play with her romantically. Our relationship in game is "More than friends" as Ulu put it, but that was as far as the role-playing went.

Ulu's Correction 10/01/2004 - I did not think/realize that I was roleplaying. For a while though, that was all it was.

Ulu's Correction 10/01/2004 -Kara didn’t mention that he had some sort of feelings for me, although he later told me that it was ‘roleplay’ feelings that only extended to friendship outside of game. I must admit I’m still having trouble understanding that.

About mid June, she started to hang out a lot with Ardahl, and since it's her life and we were just role-playing I backed away and let her do what she wants.

Around 7/2nd or 7/3rd or so, it was the big patch for the Summer Fest. So during the patch she messaged me and says she needs to talk and asked if I want to talk on POL or AIM. So we chatted on POL, then the music got really annoying after a long time and we chatted on AIM. I don't ask for girls RL info unless they volunteer, it's a matter of principle for me. So it is the first time I talked to her outside of game.

She said she been interested in Ardahl, and that few days ago Ardahl made his move and she doesn't know what to do. So I told her if she likes Ardahl then go with Ardahl, there is no problem with that, I was perfectly ok with it. She said she doesn't though, she wants me. I made sure the only reason she wants me is not because she is guilty over her and Ardahl and she said she wasn't. She said there were some things about Ardahl she sees that makes her not want to get together with him. So I accepted that reason.  She told me is it ok to tell Ardahl if she is seeing me, I thought about it, yeah its fine I said. I know Ardahl knows who my girlfriend is, but I thought he was more mature at dealing with things.

It is also the time Ulu confessed her feelings are not as clear cut as it once were. She is developing or already had strong feelings towards me - that the difference between RL and In-Game is no longer as clear cut. I immediately told her that I have a RL girlfriend. To let her down easy I told her we don't know how serious we are yet, but I'll know in a 2-3 weeks. In those 2-3 weeks I was planning to slowly distancing myself and to let her feelings down in a more gentle fashion. I still promised her that in 2-3 weeks no matter what happens I will tell her who my girlfriend is. Mainly because Ulu knows her too (in game) and I didn't want to damage their friendship.

So she told Ardahl and afterwards she messaged me and says it went fine.

On 7/3rd she went to the bon dance. She came back and told me we need to talk, to which we did. Ardahl told her who my girlfriend is without talking to me or my girlfriend first. Ulu is crushed, and asked me why didn't I tell her who it was; I said it's because I don't want to damage their friendship. I am fine with me and Ulu not talking to each other again, and if that is what she chooses I am fine with that. Ulu asked me when did I plan to tell my girlfriend, I said originally I planned to tell her in a few weeks, but now I am going to tell her next week (it was a Saturday night already). She said I need to tell her now or she will, and I told her, its 4th of July tomorrow and I am not sure if she has guests. If she has no plans then I will tell her, if not then I'll wait till Monday.

So I told my girlfriend and I told her what I was doing and what I planned to do. She was upset, partially at me, and partially at Ardahl for breaking his promise. I don't want her to dislike Ardahl for what happened, so I told her Ardahl probably only had her and Ulu's best interest in mind, and that manage to calm her down.

So the next day or a few days later, Ardahl told my Girlfriend, and what was said I have no idea. I was told that Ardahl said he realized he fucked up.  Ardahl is very much in a depression and was very sorry for the whole affair.  He didn't log on for a few days and when he did he messaged me to apologize.  To which I said its fine, if he did it to protect Ulu and my Girlfriend I have no problem with it. He doesn't need to say he is sorry to me, whatever absolution or forgive he needs to get over it, I give it. It is also the time he gave me 2 different reasons for why he did what he did, but at that point it doesn't matter anymore. So I didn't care.

So ends the stage of Act 1.

　

Act II

I wasn't involved in this, this is from what Ulu and my Girlfriend told me.  I stayed out of this whole affair because I am too close to the cause of Ulu's pain. So I gave her the space she needed to sort out her feelings and didn't interfere or meddle.

So I don't talk to Ulu much and mostly by her initiation, and mostly its small talk and that she wants to stay friends, which I am fine with. She spent lots of time with Ardahl. It is her choice so I didn't even bring it up when we talk. Ardahl however still confides in my Girlfriend, and he said he still has strong feelings for Ulu and that their line has been blurred. My girlfriend told him flat out: "Ulu is confused right now, she is vulnerable, and if you have strong feelings for her you need to back off and give her space. The lines are not blurred, it's only blurred in your mind." Ardahl ignored that, and stayed very close to Ulu.

Later on Ulu gave Ardahl the "We are just friends" talk. Of course Ardahl is crushed, and my Girlfriend comforted him and made him promise to NOT get drunk. And then he gets drunk with Starbucket, and said it's because he needed to get drunk to make Starbucket feel better. There are other reasons he said which is not important. The main thing is my GF is pissed again for Ardahl breaking yet another promise.

Sometime in between those two things or maybe it was after Ardahl told my GF he is making a difference in Ulu's life that he is helping her forget about me. To which my GF said Ulu doesn't need to forget, forget is a bad thing to do; Ulu needs to deal with her own feelings and sort it out. She told Ardahl yet again to give Ulu space. Either soon after or a bit before Ulu herself made Ardahl promise not to push her into a relationship. My GF was concerned about Ardahl's intentions and literally told Ardahl to back the fuck off. To which Ardahl ignored.

At the same time my GF realize Ulu is really all alone, the only other friend she had is me, and for the above reasons she is no longer capable of confiding in me. So all that is in Ulu's life right now is Ardahl, and so far Ardahl doesn't seem to be objective about what he is doing. So she tried to talk to Ulu and be the voice of moderation in her life. She mainly tried to be a mirror and bounce Ulu's thoughts back at her.

This happened for another two weeks or so, maybe 3. Ulu and I still talk but merely about superficial stuff, nothing of substance, things like our daily routine, weather, etc. Just talk for talks sake. The repeated theme is she wants to be my friend. Yet through out this time she treated me like dirt. She wants to be my friend but she acts in an unfriendly manner. I talked to her about how she acts each time she would say she is sorry but she have no idea why she does it - then she just repeats it again. I just thought she resents me and can't bring herself to admit to it. I hurt her, so I deserve to be hurt in return. So I took it - no biggy.

Ulu's Correction 10/01/2004 - In Act 2, Kara mentions that I treated him badly while trying to be friends with him again, and I felt that I was wrong in that and apologize for it. I was upset with him, although I refused to admit it to myself at the time. Even if he feels he deserved it, I had no right.

Then my girlfriend started working so she doesn't have time to really talk to Ulu anymore, or anyone for that matter. And the only voice in Ulu's life became Ardahl's again.

Act III

I was worried for Ulu now, and I feel really responsible because I am the one who made her vulnerable. But I am also too close to the situation, so I asked people around for advice. I told them a mirror situation using no names, just the basic situation.  Everyone I asked said it is bad - Starzlit, Nara, and 3 RL friends all agreed it is bad.

That is when I met her one day and told her she needs to be careful around Ardahl. I told her Ardahl is the type that: if doing A is dishonorable, but it gives him what he wants; Doing B is honorable and it is similar to doing A; Ardahl is the type to Do A and believe even to himself that he is doing B. It is a matter of self justification. I was hoping Ulu would make the parallel between A, B, and what Ardahl may be doing to her and be careful.

It is that conversation I told her I am the LAST person that should say that, but there really isn't anyone else to say it. I asked her if I should talk to her about Ardahl in the future, I am really close to the issue so I am not the best person to do it. She said she appreciates it, and she gets tunnel vision, and it is good that I can tell her another side of it. So I said ok, then if you want, I will talk to you about Ardahl in the future.

This is about few days before Summer fest I think, maybe a week. And I thought nothing of it. I believe Ulu is smart enough to handle her own life and deal with her own problems. So I worry much about it. Ulu still treated me the same way, which is not very friend like, but it's my punishment and I am ok with that.

So Summer fest came, and I was busy with my girlfriend most of the time, and one day I was talking to Ulu and she gave me the same say one thing but do another treatment, so I was really mad and I told her, if you say I am your friend then treat me as one, if you don't want to then say I am not your friend, this has gone on far enough - you treat me like dirt one more time, just do yourself a favor and delete me off your flist because I am deleting you off mine. She apologized and told me she and Ardahl is getting serious.  So I asked how serious, and she conveyed that about a week ago Ardahl really started pushing her, and she started to give in. I was shocked, that coincided with the when I started spending all my free time with my girlfriend, and Ardahl knows about that schedule way in advance, and according to my GF Ardahl asked her repeated when that is was taking place.  So I told Ulu we have to talk, and Ulu grudgingly agreed. This is about a week after summer fest started.

I told her I need to talk to her about Ardahl and asked her if she wants to listen. She said she did, and I said good because I promised to tell you about Ardahl before (I take what I said I'll do very seriously) and I am glad she wants to listen because if she didn't, I would be forced to bug her about it, and she will probably have to blist me. So I told her what I see is going on, how Ardahl is pushing her and how he is doing so knowing she is confused and hurt from what happened between us. I told her I see Ardahl behaving in a manipulative and dishonorable manner; I told her that if she is to go into a relationship with Ardahl she should know all these things ahead of time. I told her this is what I see is happening and the reasons why I believe what I see is true. She told me other things Ardahl did, but what she told me isn't relevant really to this drama. So after I told her what I needed to say, I told her, "don't take my word for it. Talk to your other friends about it, see what they say." And I told her, "It is your life, and you should live it as how you want to live it, don't live it because others told you how to live it. Do not not date Ardahl because I what I said, make your own decisions." But I asked her after she did whatever she decides to do; I want to know the result of it.

Ulu's Correction 10/01/2004 - Kara told me after his talk with me in Act 3 that if I didn’t listen to him again or treated him like dirt again he’d throw away the rest of our friendship. During it, he did focus quite a bit more on how Ard was manipulating me and how can I trust a person like that than mentioned in the story. I was crushed by all this, and it took me a week to sort myself out. I don’t know what Ard and Kara said in their talk during that time, but apparently Kara was harsher with Ard than with me (which is an understatement from what I understand). Ard does not feel that he manipulated me at any time, but he did question himself, which led to a pretty bad depression. Wanting to take himself off Moderator status was because of something he regretted doing, but had nothing to do with manipulation.

Clarification after Ulu's Correction on 10/01/2004 - I told him exactly what I told you, in a matter of fact tone.  But Ardahl can send his correction about that.

Thus I did a friend's duty and it is case closed for me. I haven't talk talked to her after that till she talked to me again.

And Ulu did go talk to her friend about it, and his advice is meaner than mine. He was really upset over what Ardahl said and his language was not so nice.

In the mean time however, the Ardahl messaged me and said "Why?" I said "Why what?" He said "Why did you take away the only thing that made us happy?" And I was confused. So I told him exactly what I thought of what he did. At first he was defending himself, then I guess he realized what he did was wrong, and fall into the same depth of depress he did the first time at the beginning of this tale. So he felt really bad and talked to Elysia about taking himself off Moderator status and I think about how badly he feel about what he did.

Elysia talked to me about what happened so I told him my case, he is unconvinced but cautious, which is to be expected.

But Rhianna is a different story. She jumped on me and insulted me plenty.  She said I deliberately hurt Ardahl and Ulu because I didn't get what I want. She said I did it because I am malicious, he said I forced Ulu into breaking up with Ardahl because I am mad that I lost one of my harems. She said I tried to manipulate her too, and that I flirts with everyone in the LS even her. To which I point out who is everyone in LS? Besides Ulu, who this whole thing revolves, besides Aly who everyone knows I am partner with, etc. etc. and most of all I didn't flirt with her (Rhianna). She insists that I did, so it's she said I said. She said I flirted with her, I said I didn't. I criticized her on how she can take a side without knowing any facts of the matter, she said she is not on anyone's side, if she is on any side, she would be on Ulu's side. And I said then how do you say you are on Ulu's side when you just said Ulu can't make up her own mind and hurt Ardahl, you are obviously on Ardahl's side. I told her before she even open her mouth she needed to talk to everyone involved first, and she said "Oh I will". So I said then before you talk to me again go talk to Ulu first, and if I didn't do what you said I did, then you owe me an apology.

-As for that talk with Rhi in Act 3, after having her talk with me, she decided from that what to apologize on. She of course, didn’t apologize for the things she still believed in after talking with me. Rhi did indeed jump to conclusions, but she at least told me that she realized which ones those were after talking with me. She had her facts, and made her own decisions based on that. I don’t think I ever knew what it was she apologized for, but that’s at least what I noticed about that part of the story.

A few days later, she apologized but only for a very small part of what she said. So I promptly deleted her off my flist. I don't need people to insult me without any support and not apologize for it after. I haven't only talked to Rhianna once after that, and that is to ask her where Noora is, and that is yesterday.

Clarification after Ulu's Correction on 10/01/2004 - She apologized for not believing me when I said I didn't talk to you on Saturday.  That’s all she apologized for.  She didn't apologize for jumping into conclusions, she didn't apologize for making generalized statement that is not true, she didn't apologize for saying things just to say it, she didn't apologize for behaving like an arse because she is angry, etc.

Act IV

The final nail in the coffin in me and Ulu's friendship is after that happened.  A few days later Ulu talked to my GF and in the conversation she said that "if she thought Ardahl is the one and had no doubt about it, she would tell me to shove off." To me shove off is a polite way of saying Fuck off, but the meaning doesn't change. She then in a later conversation to me told me that She thinks I manipulated her. She also said if I don't like her decision then I just have to deal.   I didn't think she considered me much of a friend, so I distanced myself form her after that.

Ulu's Correction 10/01/2004 - In reference to Act 4: Indeed, if I had really thought Ard and I were meant for each other, I would have said to leave us alone on it. But I certainly didn’t feel that way.

Clarification after Ulu's Correction on 10/01/2004 - It is the choice of word you used.  Not what you said.  Telling a friend to "Fuck off" is not a very friendly thing to do.  You said "shove off", to me that is just a nice way to say "Fuck off" meanings and all.  To you it might be ok to say that to a friend, to me It is not.

In the same conversation when she told me she wants to try a relationship with Ardahl, I told her that I really don't care what she decided on; it is after all her life. I did what I did because I promised to do so, and whatever she decided on I really don't feel about it one way or the other. I just gave her one more warning, for better or for worse, Ardahl is still the same person, so be careful.
She said she knows but she is willing to overlook his flaws. Then I wished them best of luck and that was the end of the conversation. Since then I have not talked to either Ulu or Ardahl about their relationship.

Afterwards I waited for a week or so see if Ulu treated me as a friend still. We still say hi to each other in tell, and good nights, and as the "Hi"s and "Goodnights"s dwindled to none, I deleted Ulu off my flist.   This is about 2 weeks or so ago.

And that is where I left it, I haven't talked to anyone about it at all, not Ardahl, not Ulu, not Rhianna, not Elysia/Noora, and not even my Girlfriend.

Nothing else happened, as far as I know.  If anything added to this drama I was unaware of it

Till yesterday
　

That is the meat and bone of the drama that started the whole thing, everything else is connected to this.

Does it make more sense to you guys now?

Ulu's Correction 10/01/2004 - That’s all I can really think of to say here. Things I’ve actively omitted I feel are either not my place to say, are not necessary, or simply are not things I want on a public page. -For those of you who read this and have any questions about things that I haven’t mentioned, come talk to me. I’m quite tired of all of this, but please don’t feel like I should be avoided if you have questions.

If anyone have any corrections or questions you can e-mail it to JamesX_News@Earthlink.net, or you can send me a message via POL.  I will append any corrections at the bottom of this page.

The E-mail I sent my Girlfriend, on 9/22/2004, at 10:23am

I am tired of the drama Honey-wanny, so I wrote it down and put it on a web site because the forum is down. Can you please read it and send me any corrections?

http://wheeedrama.tripod.com/TheDrama.htm

This the E-mail I send Ulu, on 9/22/2004, at 11:21am, to POL E-mail

I am tired of what happened between you me and ardahl keep getting rehashed and brought back up, and each time seem with a different twist. So I wrote a record of what I remember. Please read it and send me any corrections. If you don't have any corrections please send me a message to that effect as well. I am tired of people knowing only half the story, so I am going to try to make a full account. After you and Elle look it over, I am going to send it to Ardahl to look over. The maybe we can get to the bottom of all this instead of people each having a different account of what happened.

http://wheeedrama.tripod.com/TheDrama.htm

Please help me out.
James X.

This the E-mail Rhianna sent me, on 9/22/2004, at 8:51pm.  

________________________________________
From: Rhianna Pol
Sent: Wednesday, September 22, 2004 8:51 PM
To: JamesX_News@Earthlink.net
Subject: Corrections

You totally omitted your involvement with Act II.

a)  You talked with Ulu on Friday night before the weekend and gave her an ultimatum that either she treat you like a friend and listen to your opinions or you wouldn't be friends with her.  On that night you also gave her your opinion of Ardahl and how he was manipulating her. 

b)  You talked with me on Saturday about the issue of Ard breaking some of his trust with Ulu in somewhat vague terms, but easily recognizable.  You told me at that time that he was just "trying to get in her pants".  In between talking to me, Ulu gave Ard the "Let's be Friends" speech.  I spoke with you on Sunday on not following your agreement with me to leave it alone for awhile, upon which you swore that you hadn't talked to ulu since you talked to me.  You conveninently left out the fact that you talked to her on Friday before I talked to you, thus making you not lying like I said you were, but lying by omission and in spirit.  I talked to ulu and found this out and also found out that my suspicions were true and she believed you were manipulating her.  I decided at that point that you were not my friend and never would be.  Anyone who can callously manipulate people and who can so easily split words and lie is not someone I wan ted to associate with.  I felt honor bound to apologize to you for the single thing that I was wrong about (the timing of the incident), but no more would you get from me.

It's not a matter of maturity to not keep secrets.  Secrets only get people in trouble, just like they've gotten you in trouble.  If you were mature, you would have told all of the girls (I know of at least 2), that you had a RL girlfriend before any of this happened.  In addition, you specifically told me that Alyana had a problem keeping the game and real life in perspective, but yet you continued to lead her on throughout all of this.  

Rhianna 

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This the Reply E-mail I send to Rhianna, on 9/23/2004, at 11:50am.

________________________________________
From: Rhianna Pol
Sent: Wednesday, September 22, 2004 8:51 PM
To: JamesX_News@Earthlink.net
Subject: Corrections

> You totally omitted your involvement with Act II.
> It's not a matter of maturity to not keep secrets. Secrets only get
> people in trouble, just like they've gotten you in trouble. If you
> were mature, you would have told all of the girls (I know of at least
> 2), that you had a RL girlfriend before any of this happened. In
> addition, you specifically told me that Alyana had a problem keeping
> the game and real life in perspective, but yet you continued to lead her on throughout all of this.

Actually that is act 3.
Act 2 is before that.
Act 3 is when I talked to Ulu about Ardahl, read it through.

Act 2 is before my girlfriend got a job and that is hemm… July 18th ish.

I talked to Ulu about Ardahl at the middle of summer fest, that’s around 30th of july or something.

> a)  You talked with Ulu on Friday night before the weekend and gave
> her an ultimatum that either she treat you like a friend and listen to
> your opinions or you wouldn't be friends with her.  On that night you
> also gave her your opinion of Ardahl and how he was manipulating her.


Nothing is Omitted, you just have to finish reading it. Yes it happened as I said it happened, Ulu already is reading it. You will just have to wait for her corrections.


> b)  You talked with me on Saturday about the issue of Ard breaking
> some of his trust with Ulu in somewhat vague terms, but easily
> recognizable.  You told me at that time that he was just "trying to
> get in her pants".  In between talking to me, Ulu gave Ard the "Let's
> be Friends" speech.  I spoke with you on Sunday on not following your
> agreement with me to leave it alone for awhile, upon which you swore that you hadn't talked to ulu since you talked to me.

That is my assement. As far as I see it, Ardahl has throw away the trust of a friend who said “I just need a friend right now” and tried to get her into a relationship. The Lets be friend speed is WAY longer. It is when Ulu first started hang out with Ardahl. The Lets be friend speed you are referring to is the 2nd Speech.

It is during the first lets be friend speech I think that Ardahl promised that he won't push Ulu.

> You conveninently left
> out the fact that you talked to her on Friday before I talked to you,
> thus making you not lying like I said you were, but lying by omission and in spirit.

How was I omission? The issue I talked to you about isn't related to Ulu or Ardahl. It is a issue that is separate. I asked you because you have more experience with online communities. I would have asked Elysia but he wasn't on, and I didn't want to bring it to his attention without asking someone who knows more about how things are done than I. If you think I told you trying to alienate you from Ardahl? No. You are very much mistaken. I didn't want to get anyone else involved, as far as I am concerned it is me, Ardahl, Ulu, and my Girlfriend. It is stricktly a personal issue. And if you think I am the type to need other's help in solving things, you don't know jack.

As for not telling you I talked to Ulu before I talked to you? Hemm... I said I was recently told by a friend. If you know I was talking about Ulu, then how can you say I didn't "tell" you I talked to her recently. How is that any omission of truth?

Did I asked you to get involved with what is happening? Did I ask you advice about that? If I didn't why would I talk to you about it? Even now you still till the issue I talked to you is any part of Ulu or Ardahl? No, the reason I talked to you about it is exactly the same reason I told you then. I am not sure if that issue is a problem enough for the LS to get involved. That is why I asked you about it, since of everyone I know You and Elysia are the only ones who have had extensive experience with online communities. So in another words, GET over your own prejudices and look at facts.

> I talked to ulu and
> found this out and also found out that my suspicions were true and she
> believed you were manipulating her.

Exactly, that's the main reason why I deleted her off my Flist. She think I manipulated her, then she really doesn't know me as well as she should.


>I decided at that point that you were not my friend and never would
>be. Anyone who can callously manipulate people and who can so easily
>split words and lie is not someone I wan ted to associate with. I felt
>honor bound to apologize to you for the single thing that I was wrong
>about (the timing of the incident), but no more would you get from me.

Exactly, I don't want to be your friend either. Because you make judgement calls without knowing facts. Just like the previous things you said. You never even BOTHERD to find out the facts before you make a judgement call.



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This the 2nd Reply E-mail I send to Rhianna, on 9/23/2004, at 12:01pm.  I cut and pasted wrong and forgot to address one of Rhianna's passages, so I sent a 2nd message about it.  This is the 2nd message, put there in the same form as the first one

________________________________________
From: Rhianna Pol [mailto:rhianna@mail.com]
Sent: Wednesday, September 22, 2004 8:51 PM
To: JamesX_News@Earthlink.net
Subject: Corrections

> It's not a matter of maturity to not keep secrets.  Secrets only get
> people in trouble, > just like they've gotten you in trouble.  If you
> were mature, you would have told all of the girls (I know of at least
> 2), that you had a RL girlfriend before any of this happened.  In
> addition, you specifically told me that Alyana had a problem keeping the game and real life in perspective, but yet you continued to lead her on throughout all of this.
> Rhianna

Oops, I must have cut and pasted too fast, this part I missed.

You are once again confused. I didn't say Alyana had problem keeping game and real life in perspective. I said that about Ulu, because that exactly what Ulu told me. She told me after a certain point it became futile and that is when I told her I had a girlfriend.

As for keeping secrets, I kept what happened with Ulu and Ardahl and me underwrapps because it is personal and it really just involves us.

When it involved you and Elysia, and not because I got you guys involved, I still kept my silence because I didn't want it to affect the Linkshell.

Now I am no longer keeping it quiet because I am not going to have half truths floating around and if I am accused by something then let people judge on their own. With the REAL information. I have already asked Ulu and my girlfriend to look it over, when they do and make it less one sided document (so far it really is just my story) I will ask Ardahl do correct it just as Ulu and my girlfriend will have done.

Truth might not be what you like Rhianna, you can make me the bad guy ALL you want. The truth will be between what we all says. You will just have to wait for it, instead of jumping to conclusions.

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I made a mistake on the correction I sent Rhianna the previous day.  So I sent this e-mail today, 9/24/2004, at 10:44am.

________________________________________
From: Rhianna Pol [mailto:rhianna@mail.com]
Sent: Wednesday, September 22, 2004 8:51 PM
To: JamesX_News@Earthlink.net
Subject: Corrections

> In addition, you specifically told me that Alyana had a problem
>keeping the game and real life in perspective, but yet you continued
>to lead her on throughout all of this.

Oops I am sorry Rhianna, I made a mistake on my corrections. You right there was one time I said Alyana had problem separating in game things with RL, that's about April of this year. I didn't remember it till Ulu reminded me of it last night.

Sorry, but in this case you were right, I did say Alyana had problem separating in game things with RL.

And FYI, no Alyana doesn't confuse our in game role-playing with RL Feelings. There is no RL romantic feelings, at least that is what I was told.

James X.
　

The 2nd E-mail Rhinna sent me.  Sent on Tue 9/28/2004 3:33 PM, but I didn't check e-mail till today 9/30/2004 at around 11:30 am.

 ________________________________________

From: Rhianna Pol

Sent: Tuesday, September 28, 2004 3:33 PM

To: James X.

Subject: RE: Corrections

Actually, you are incorrect in your timing. 

Act I happened around the beginning or middle of June.  Act II happened July 3rd or 4th for the first part of it and July 9/10 for the second part of it.  You gave Ulu your ultimatium on July 2nd.  You spoke with me on July 3/4 and Ulu talked to you on the 4th at which point you pretended that it was all ok.  July 9/10 is when Starbucket had her issues and when Ard got drunk with her to help her feel better, which had nothing to do with this situation.  Summerfest occured Jul. 23 to Aug. 8th.  You've totally split out Act II and III when they occurred at roughly the same time.  If you're going to do this, you should put the disclaimer that Act II is what you think of what happened between your girlfriend and Ulu, whereas Act III is what happened between you and Ulu occurring at the same time.  In addition, you keep shrinking time when it's to your benefit to do so, such as when 'Sometime in between those two things' referring to Ard when that is really the passing of at least two months.  And you keep expanding time when it's in your benefit to do so, such as 'This happened for another two weeks or so, maybe 3'.

"You conveninently left out the fact that you talked to her on Friday before I talked to you, thus making you not lying like I said you were, but lying by omission and in spirit.  I talked to ulu and found this out and also found out that my suspicions were true and she believed you were manipulating her. "  This quote was in reference to Act III, which is why it was a separate bullet point with regards to your accusations about me.  At that point we specifically talked about Ulu and Ard.  Again, you've conveniently twisted up the timing in order to make yourself seem innocent. 

Rhianna

--

___________________________________________________________

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My Reply to Rhianna's 2nd E-mail.  Sent on 9/30/2004 11:55am

> ________________________________________
> From: Rhianna Pol [mailto:rhianna@mail.com]
> Sent: Tuesday, September 28, 2004 3:33 PM
> To: James X.
> Subject: RE: Corrections

> Actually, you are incorrect in your timing. Act I happened around the
> beginning or middle of June.  Act II happened July 3rd or 4th for the
> first part of it and July 9/10 for the second part of it.

I am not sure where you reading this from Rhianna, but start of Act 1 is June, I even said it. Act I ended with the break up which was July 3/4. That is what I said.


> You gave Ulu
> your ultimatium on July 2nd.

That is wrong as well. I never gave Ulu any ultimatum, until our final talk, and that was in Summerfest - the middle of summerfest, the first weekend of it.


> You spoke with me on July 3/4 and Ulu talked to you

Ok now you are REALLY getting the time wrong on this. July 3/4th is the weekend Ardahl told Ulu who my GF is. If you don't rememberly clearly ask Ulu. I remember because it was the bon dance for her. And My GF had company the 3rd and 4th. You should make sure with Ulu and Ardahl before you start correcting people. Have you asked them? Is this what *they* said? Or is this what you remember? Do you remember you weren't even involved at that point?

And if either Ardahl or Ulu is having problem remembering, just remind Ulu when she and I talked she was wearing her Yukata. Which means it HAS to be after summerfest started, which means it can't be your memory of 7/3rd or 7/4th.

If you haven't talked to them before you start making correction Rhianna, you REALLY should get your facts straight before you try.


> on the 4th at which point you pretended that it was all ok.  July 9/10
> is when Starbucket had her issues and when Ard got drunk with her to
> help her feel better, which had nothing to do with this situation.

I don't remember when the Starbucket thing is. It has to do with the issue because it was the day or the day after Ulu told Ardahl they are just friends. So Ardah was venting to my GF about it. My GF told him to promise not to get Drunk, Ardahl agreed. Then he got drunk with the excuse well Starbucket was going to get drunk anyways. It is important because it marks the first time Ulu told Ardahl they are just friends, that's why I marked it.


> Summerfest occured Jul. 23 to Aug.
> 8th.  You've totally split out Act II and III when they occurred at
> roughly the same time.

If you look at the dividing line, the dividing line is when my GF got a job and isn't on FF anymore. That is what splits Act II and Act III, because in Act III that is when I got involved because no one else is. Before she got a job I did bother getting involved because Ulu has a balancing force in her life.



> If you're going to do this, you should put the disclaimer that Act II
> is what you think of what happened between your girlfriend and Ulu,
> whereas Act III is what happened between you and Ulu occurring at the same time.

Act II is what I was told by Ulu and my Girlfrend and even Ardahl of what happened. It is not what I *think* happened. It is what I was *TOLD* happened. If Ardahl and Ulu disagrees with what happened, they will send their corrections in.

As for occurring at the same time, Act II is only about 2 weeks, Act III is only about 2 weeks. It is sequential not parallel.


> In addition, you keep
> shrinking time when it's to your benefit to do so, such as when
> 'Sometime in between those two things' referring to Ard when that is
> really the passing of at least two months.  And you keep expanding
> time when it's in your benefit to do so, such as 'This happened for another two weeks or so, maybe 3'.

It actually isn't shrinking time, you are remembering time wrong.

Ulu and I parted ways July 3rd, which was the big patch for summerfest

I gave Ulu the big talk on the first weekend of ummer fest that is around July 30th or so.

The whole thing happened in around 4 weeks time.

And what happened after we had the big talk? It is as I said. I didn't talk to Ulu about it anymore. You and Elysia are the ones who did. Ulu talked to me the day after you talked to her, which was Sunday or Monday, I think sunday. And that case was closed.

As for what went on for another 3-4 weeks? I don't know. Because I did what I said I'll do. I told Ulu a different view point she might or might not have seen. That is done, her choice is hers. I have washed my hands of it.

The 3rd E-mail from Rhianna, Receievd on 10/3/2004, at 1:14pm.  It was Sent on 10/01/2004, at 1:35pm though.

 ________________________________________

From: Rhianna Pol [mailto:rhianna@mail.com]

Sent: Friday, October 01, 2004 1:35 PM

To: James X.

Subject: RE: Corrections corrections

I made some mistakes in my corrections as well.  I extrapolated from the July 9/10 events, and when I did some more checking in my logs today I realized that the events I attributed to July 3/4 were actually July 30/31 and August 01.   You don't mention the 'Let's Be Friends' talk in Act III but you do mention it in Act II.  Act III is the talk that I had heard about, which occurs in your story betweeen 'and his language was not so nice.' and 'In the mean time however, '.  This is what made me believe that Act II and III were the same time period.

Rhianna

----- Original Message -----

From: "James X."

Date: Thu, 30 Sep 2004 11:54:26 -0700

To: "'Rhianna Pol'"

Subject: RE: Corrections

> > ________________________________________

> > From: Rhianna Pol [mailto:rhianna@mail.com]

> > Sent: Tuesday, September 28, 2004 3:33 PM

> > To: James X.

> > Subject: RE: Corrections

>

> > Actually, you are incorrect in your timing. 

> > Act I happened around the beginning or middle of June.  Act II happened

> July 3rd

> > or 4th for the first part of it and July 9/10 for the second part of it. 

>

> I am not sure where you reading this from Rhianna, but start of Act 1 is

> June, I even said it. Act I ended with the break up which was July 3/4.

> That is what I said.

>

>

> > You gave Ulu

> > your ul timatium on July 2nd. 

>

> That is wrong as well. I never gave Ulu any ultimatum, until our final

> talk, and that was in Summerfest - the middle of summerfest, the first

> weekend of it.

>

>

> > You spoke with me on July 3/4 and Ulu talked to you

>

> Ok now you are REALLY getting the time wrong on this. July 3/4th is the

> weekend Ardahl told Ulu who my GF is. If you don't rememberly clearly ask

> Ulu. I remember because it was the bon dance for her. And My GF had

> company the 3rd and 4th. You should make sure with Ulu and Ardahl before

> you start correcting people. Have you asked them? Is this what *they*

> said? Or is this what you remember? Do you remember you weren't even

> involved at that point?

>

> And if either Ardahl or Ulu is having problem remembering, just remind Ulu

> when she and I talked she was wearing her Yukata. Which mean s it HAS to be

> after summerfest started, which means it can't be your memory of 7/3rd or

> 7/4th.

>

> If you haven't talked to them before you start making correction Rhianna,

> you REALLY should get your facts straight before you try.

>

>

> > on the 4th at which point you pretended that it was all ok.  July 9/10 is

> when

> > Starbucket had her issues and when Ard got drunk with her to help her feel

> better,

> > which had nothing to do with this situation. 

>

> I don't remember when the Starbucket thing is. It has to do with the issue

> because it was the day or the day after Ulu told Ardahl they are just

> friends. So Ardah was venting to my GF about it. My GF told him to promise

> not to get Drunk, Ardahl agreed. Then he got drunk with the excuse well

> Starbucket was going to get drunk anyways. It is important because it mark s

> the first time Ulu told Ardahl they are just friends, that's why I marked

> it.

>

>

> > Summerfest occured Jul. 23 to Aug.

> > 8th.  You've totally split out Act II and III when they occurred at

> roughly the same

> > time. 

>

> If you look at the dividing line, the dividing line is when my GF got a job

> and isn't on FF anymore. That is what splits Act II and Act III, because in

> Act III that is when I got involved because no one else is. Before she got

> a job I did bother getting involved because Ulu has a balancing force in her

> life.

>

>

>

> > If you're going to do this, you should put the disclaimer that Act II is

> what you

> > think of what happened between your girlfriend and Ulu, whereas Act III is

> what

> > happened between you and Ulu occurring at the same time. 

>

> Act II is what I was told by Ulu and my Girlfrend and even Ardahl of what

> happened. It is not what I *think* happened. It is what I was *TOLD*

> happened. If Ardahl and Ulu disagrees with what happened, they will send

> their corrections in.

>

> As for occurring at the same time, Act II is only about 2 weeks, Act III is

> only about 2 weeks. It is sequential not parallel.

>

>

> > In addition, you keep

> > shrinking time when it's to your benefit to do so, such as when 'Sometime

> in

> > between those two things' referring to Ard when that is really the passing

> of at least

> > two months.  And you keep expanding time when it's in your benefit to do

> so, such

> > as 'This happened for another two weeks or so, maybe 3'.

>

> It actually isn't shrinking time, you are remembering time wrong.

>

> Ulu and I part ed ways July 3rd, which was the big patch for summerfest

>

> I gave Ulu the big talk on the first weekend of ummer fest that is around

> July 30th or so.

>

> The whole thing happened in around 4 weeks time.

>

> And what happened after we had the big talk? It is as I said. I didn't

> talk to Ulu about it anymore. You and Elysia are the ones who did. Ulu

> talked to me the day after you talked to her, which was Sunday or Monday, I

> think sunday. And that case was closed.

>

> As for what went on for another 3-4 weeks? I don't know. Because I did

> what I said I'll do. I told Ulu a different view point she might or might

> not have seen. That is done, her choice is hers. I have washed my hands of

> it.

>

>

--

___________________________________________________________

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Ulu's Correction Received on 10/3/2004 at 1:17pm, but it was Sent on 10/01/2004 at 3:09pm

 
-----Original Message-----
From: Ulu
Sent: Friday, October 01, 2004 3:09 PM
To: JamesX_News@Earthlink.net
Subject: Corrections (finally)

Here's my corrections as an attachment.

_________________________________________________________________

-I did not think/realize that I was roleplaying. For a while though, that was all it was.

-Kara didn’t mention that he had some sort of feelings for me, although he later told me that it was ‘roleplay’ feelings that only extended to friendship outside of game. I must admit I’m still having trouble understanding that.

-In Act 2, Kara mentions that I treated him badly while trying to be friends with him again, and I felt that I was wrong in that and apologize for it. I was upset with him, although I refused to admit it to myself at the time. Even if he feels he deserved it, I had no right.

-Kara told me after his talk with me in Act 3 that if I didn’t listen to him again or treated him like dirt again he’d throw away the rest of our friendship. During it, he did focus quite a bit more on how Ard was manipulating me and how can I trust a person like that than mentioned in the story. I was crushed by all this, and it took me a week to sort myself out. I don’t know what Ard and Kara said in their talk during that time, but apparently Kara was harsher with Ard than with me (which is an understatement from what I understand). Ard does not feel that he manipulated me at any time, but he did question himself, which led to a pretty bad depression. Wanting to take himself off Moderator status was because of something he regretted doing, but had nothing to do with manipulation.

-And at the end of the conversation that I told Kara my decision regarding Ard and I, I did tell you why I thought he manipulated me. “If you don’t listen to me or treat me badly again and I throw away our friendship.” I truly felt that you were saying “him or me” which really, really hurt. That is why I felt I was manipulated, and when I told Kara so he said it was not his intention. Later on in a conversation we had, Kara said that he doesn’t remember giving me the ‘if you don’t listen to me’ part of his ultimatum. Neither of us managed to save the chat log of the that talk, so its simply what we each remember. All I can really say about that is even though I tend to forget the details of conversations as well as their timing, certain things that catch my attention I remember well. An ultimatum like that is one of them, so I’m doubting I heard wrong. But we really will never know, unfortunately.

-As for that talk with Rhi in Act 3, after having her talk with me, she decided from that what to apologize on. She of course, didn’t apologize for the things she still believed in after talking with me. Rhi did indeed jump to conclusions, but she at least told me that she realized which ones those were after talking with me. She had her facts, and made her own decisions based on that. I don’t think I ever knew what it was she apologized for, but that’s at least what I noticed about that part of the story.

-In reference to Act 4: Indeed, if I had really thought Ard and I were meant for each other, I would have said to leave us alone on it. But I certainly didn’t feel that way.

-That’s all I can really think of to say here. Things I’ve actively omitted I feel are either not my place to say, are not necessary, or simply are not things I want on a public page. -For those of you who read this and have any questions about things that I haven’t mentioned, come talk to me. I’m quite tired of all of this, but please don’t feel like I should be avoided if you have questions.

Here is the Clearfication E-mail I send Ulu after I posted her corrections.  Posted at 10/03/2004 at around 1:40pm.

-----Original Message-----
From: James X. [mailto:JamesX_News@Earthlink.net]
Sent: Sunday, October 03, 2004 1:34 PM
To: 'Ulu'
Subject: Clarifications for you

-----Original Message-----

From: Ulu

Sent: Friday, October 01, 2004 3:09 PM

To: JamesX_News@Earthlink.net

Subject: Corrections (finally)

> -Kara told me after his talk with me in Act 3 that if I didn’t listen to him again or

> treated him like dirt again he’d throw away the rest of our friendship. During it, he

> did focus quite a bit more on how Ard was manipulating me and how can I trust a

> person like that than mentioned in the story. I was crushed by all this, and it took me

> a week to sort myself out. I don’t know what Ard and Kara said in their talk during

> that time, but apparently Kara was harsher with Ard than with me (which is an

> understatement from what I understand). Ard does not feel that he manipulated me

> at any time, but he did question himself, which led to a pretty bad depression.

> Wanting to take himself off Moderator status was because of something he regretted

> doing, but had nothing to do with manipulation.

I told him exactly what I told you, in a matter of fact tone.  But Ardahl can send his correction about that.

> -As for that talk with Rhi in Act 3, after having her talk with me, she decided from that

> what to apologize on. She of course, didn’t apologize for the things she still believed

> in after talking with me. Rhi did indeed jump to conclusions, but she at least told me

> that she realized which ones those were after talking with me. She had her facts, and

> made her own decisions based on that. I don’t think I ever knew what it was she

> apologized for, but that’s at least what I noticed about that part of the story.

She apologized for not believing me when I said I didn't talk to you on Saturday.  That’s all she apologized for.  She didn't apologize for jumping into conclusions, she didn't apologize for making generalized statement that is not true, she didn't apologize for saying things just to say it, she didn't apologize for behaving like an arse because she is angry, etc.

> -In reference to Act 4: Indeed, if I had really thought Ard and I were meant for each

> other, I would have said to leave us alone on it. But I certainly didn’t feel that way.

It is the choice of word you used.  Not what you said.  Telling a friend to "Fuck off" is not a very friendly thing to do.  You said "shove off", to me that is just a nice way to say "Fuck off" meanings and all.  To you it might be ok to say that to a friend, to me It is not.